The second life of Light Yagami
by crystal-river
Summary: After Light's heart stops beating, he is thrown into the Shinigami Realm, where he is offered the perfect chance to get the ultimate revenge as a shinigami. -Rated T for language, violence and future chapters.
1. Chapter 1

I do not own Death Note. I read the manga books, I did not watch the series, so the beginning of my story happens at the end of the last book, number 12.

* * *

I felt the stinging,cold pain in my chest as I fell backwards to the hard floor. Looking up at Ryuk, God of Death, into his pitiless, dark eyes. I thought to myself that this had been inevitable, I'd known that someday he would write my name down and then that would be the end of me. But then the truth hit me in the face, harsh and cold. I was dieing. I, the great and mighty Kira which the whole WORLD, had bowed down too, the whole world pleaded to for mercy, had lost. I was dieing.

Th-thump...thump...and then there was nothing.

„D...damn it", I managed, my last breath, last moment, before all was lost to darkness.

* * *

Where am I? There is nothing here... but still,_ I am_.

No pain. No sensation. No nothing. How long had I been here?

No air. No earth. No feelings.

And then, I was _there_. I could feel the dust under my fingertips. I searched for my eyes and found them but there was nothing to look at. Everything just, empty.

_Open them you idiot._

Yes, of course, I thought to myself.

There was no blinding light, no music, instead it was dull and gray. The sky...the _sky_? It looked like smoke was floating in the air a couple of meters above me. I turned my head in the gritty dust and looked down the never-ending plain of gray, and far away mountains with sharp edges that collided with the..._sky_. And then there came sound. Like a gentle wind, ruffling leafs. But there was no wind. _Where am I_?

I decided to try and sit up. Nothing hurt. I was fine. No blood on my hands after I got shot. No pain. For, when I looked closer, there was no wound.

And no heartbeat.

...no heartbeat?

I put my hand on my chest and waited.

Nothing.

I was breathing though. But way was that? If I didn't have a heart to pump oxygen to the cells in my body, then way was I breathing.

So I was dead? But Ryuk said there was no heaven or hell so where could I be. Limbo? Huh, how bizarre...but then again...

Besides the fact that I didn't know where I was, that I was OK...except for the no-heartbeat problem, and there didn't anyone else seem to be here, I was surprisingly calm. In fact, although I could feel my body and the bottom of my shoes, I_ felt _nothing. No surprise, fear, happiness of not being dead...or alive-dead. I was...how could I put it...hollow in side. Or maybe that was just the shock? How can I describe something I can't sence?

I sat up and groaned as I felt how dry my mouth was.

"He-ello?", I groaked but then had to cough my lunds clean again after having breathed in some of the grey-ish powder on my lips.

I stood up, still coughing and sucking in air rapitly.

Then, as I stood there, turning slowly on the spot, trying to decide where to go, he was there.

_It _was there.

It was a large, thin thing, a black silk robe woven around it. It had come out of thin air it seemed. It was holding a long staff with a white skull on top, not from a human, that is for sure, 'cause there were six eye-sockets on it. I couldn't see the things face because there was a hood over it. However, from the sleeves, it's fingers were gray-white and the nails were long and yellow.

„Who are you? And where am I?", I asked, not knowing how to handle this. There was a strong possibility that this creature did not understand me...but with nothing else making sense anyways, it wouldn't hurt to try to communicate, right?

A long, harsh gasp came from beneath the hood. So it was breathing too? Was it alive...or was it ...like me?

„There has never before come a New One to the Shinigami World from Earth. You are the first", the creature thingy said with a gurgling voice.

I just stood there and gaped at it.

My mind was raising through the questions I wanted to ask him. Should I go with the obvious question: _What_? or should I try something more precise? Before I could however say anything the creature thingy spoke again.

„You are the Kira we have heard about from the others, are you not?". So he knew me? That...was a surprise, but it didn't really move me. It was just strange. But then again, so was everything else.

„Yes, I am Kira. May I ask you who you are?". I decided to go with the humble approach with the old fashioned speaking he used. The creature obviously felt good about me being curious. It stood a little straighter, I think, and there was a little pause to make his next words more affective. Since I am a smart and observant person I would guess that this being, human or not, he was proud and probably had some power around here. One might even think he was enjoying himself right now. Of course this was not put into words. „I am the King of Death. But all the other shinigami call me _Death _for short."

The King of Death. Had I not heard that somewhere before? Yes, I had. Ryuk, that son of a...something probably really ugly, had written down that The King of Death was the highest ranked shinigami in the Shinigami World.

...The Shinigami World. And then I remembered something Death had said earlier.

„We are in the Shinigami World right _now?_", I asked and looked around again. There was still nothing but gray smoke and this gray desert of dust to see. „Yes". A simple, clean answer. „And way am I hear? I though I was going to Limbo or something like that", I said and tried to see under the hood. I saw nothing. Death didn't say anything. And I waited. After a few seconds he took another deep breath. I waited, getting a little frustrated, well, you know, just a slight annoyance in the back of my mind. Of curse I didn't show it, I knew better than that. „I will arrange for you to meet someone else that can waste his time in teaching you what you need to know", Death said and then turned on his heel and started walking away.

I desided to go with,"_What?"_, but he was gone. I was alone. Again.

I walked around for what felt like hours and hours, but it didn't really matter. I was not hungry or thirsty, I did not feel any tiredness or other needs. My surroundings did not change at all either. The other shinigami appeared before me like the first one. He was suddenly there, looking at me. How disturbing. But the difference was huge. This new shinigami was taller than Death, black, and horns came from his back and his shoulders. He was wearing something tattered and old, like a potato sack with holes everywhere, probably because of the horns. He had two long arms that almost reached the ground and his feet were bare...his feet were hoofs actually. The wrinkled face was flat and he had a mouth full of sharp teeth, although some were broken, and his eyes were yellow and cat-like.

„Hi, are you Kira? I'm, Sull", he said, his voice a bit higher pitched than I had expected. „Yes. Can you tell me what I'm doing here? I thought I was going to be sent to some black hole or something", I answered, determined to get some answers now. „Oh... Are you dumb?", he replied and rolled his eyes at me. What the hell? This was a little frustrating, how was I supposed to know _way _I was here „No", I said with my teeth clenched. „Way am I here?", I tried again, talking slowly. Sull opened his mouth but then closed it again. He raised his hand to scratch his head and looked at me. „You don't know?", he asked and was obviously a little thrown off. „No, I don't", I said. Was this, Sull, stupid? Highly likely. „Well, you are here because you have become a shinigami", Sull said.

He wasn't lying. I could tell. Or at least this was what he believed.

I did not say anything for a few seconds while his words were sinking in. How could that be? Never before had I heard that a human could _become _a shinigami. That wasn't possible. Besides, I hadn't changed in appearance at all. I did not have a new Notebook which every shinigami had of their own. This had to be a trick. But by whom? Death?

„Kira?", Sull interrupted my thoughts. „You ready to leave yet?".

„Huh? B-but...no. I'm not. This is a trick. Get away from me", I said, backing away a few steps through the dust. This wasn't real. I was dead. I shouldn't be here. What the fuck?

„Oh? You want me to come later and get you then?", Sull asked and tilted his head to the side.

„I'm-I'm-I am not-I don't believe you", I stammered and felt agony grip my chest. Way was I so unstable? I was usually in control.

„Don't believe what?", the shinigami replied and stared at my shaking figure. I was losing it. FUCK!

„WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN THAT I'M_ LIKE_ YOU?", I burst out, a little surprised at the hysteria in my voice.

„Wow, chill there, Kira. Maybe I shoul come back at another time, OK?", Sull said and started to turn.

„NO!", I yelled. Damn it, I had to get a hold of myself. Come on Light, you are good at this. „No...I'm sorry, I just-this is so new to me. Lets start over again. You were saying something about me being a-a shi-shinigam-mi?", I managed. Just breath, just breath. But for _what?_ _Way _was I breathing. OK, don't think about that now. Later. Later.

„Uh, yes. You have become a shinigami", Sull said and raised one finger like ha was repeating something out of a textbook,"and are now to receive your own Death Note which you can use to expand your lifetime here in the Shinigami World and to kill others in other worlds", Sull said.

„But how can this be?", I asked, pacing back and forth. Neither Ryuk nor Ren had mentioned this. So every human that used the Death Note became a shinigami? Or was it only those who were killed by their own shinigami that became one? That must be it.

Sull was plucking at his potato sack, looking slightly bored. „Well,", he began,"when an individual has picked up a Death Note which a shinigami has dropped and has used it up to a certain level, he has crossed the barrier of physics. You see, no living thing should be able to tilt the stability of it's world so much as you have. And so, you will be eternally cursed. All shinigami were created this way", there came a slight pause. „I'm surpriced you didn't know of this", he finished.

I...I crossed the barrier of physics? That's possible?

„But I don't look anything like the other shinigami I've met. Does this mean I'll change in shape after a certain amount of time here?". I didn't say :after a certain amount time as a shinigami, because I wasn't ready to face that this might be the truth yet.

„That's because you're from the human world of course", Sull said with a shrug. „So...you're not?", I guessed. „Well, no", he snorted. „I'm a scrimsli for example, while Frost is an oged".

Everything he was saying could be true... there was nothing that suggested it couldn't fit. And with the universe so big there had to be other planets with intelligent creatures. But this also meant... „So ,you killed bad scrimslis until you broke the physics barrier too?", I asked.

„Uh, yes...and no", Sull answered. „I did take the lives of a _many _of my kind, but they weren't necessarily bad. I just killed them for the fun of it".

And I had thought Sull looked like someone that couldn't possibly do that. Then again, I didn't look scary or psycho either. Of course there was a difference though. I was doing Earth a favour because nobody else would have the guts. I had killed _bad _people. People that deserved it. I was Kira. I looked at Sull. He was looking at me.

„Prove it", I said. „Prove that I'm a shinigami".

„I can't just yet", he said and a grin crept over his flattened fave. „Way?", I shot back, eager to know the answer. If I _was_ a shinigami, I wanted to go back to Earth and have my revenge. And then I felt hot rage flow through me. I wanted to find Near and kill him. I wanted to find Near and the others and kill them all, make them pay. Plus, I wanted to punch a hole through Ryuk.

„Because you haven't gotten your Notebook, eyes or wings yet. You'll get them in a minute", he sighed. „Can we get going now? This is a real drag".

„I'll get them just like that?". A smile flashed on my face.

„Wow, your eyes just got all dark", Sull commented. I didn't care.

„Take me where ever we need to go", I snapped and embraced myself to be dragged into a portal or something.

The sudden change in my attitude must have made Sull a little confused because his forehead wrinkled and I heard a hesitating „uhhh...sure...".

The next thing I knew, my surrounding had changed. Here and there, scattered through out the plain of gray dust, all the way to the mountains, were big round balls with some kind of holes in them. And around them were creatures, shinigamis, sitting, talking...gambling? They were all pretty ugly and some even looked dangerous. So all of them had used the Death Note to kill, and they had all broken the barrier of physics. Some of them were looking through the holes in the gray balls, and here and there I could see notebooks. Now, when would I be able to have my revenge?

Sull started walking with long strides so I had to almost run to keep up with him. Only few of the shinigami around us looked up, but none of them bothered to comment on us being there it seamed. I must say that I thought there were a lot more of them. Maybe hundred of thousands, but there weren't. If I had to guess, I'd say a couple hundred at the most. So even on other planets, only a handful of those who got the Death Notes would really use it to extreme.

„Sull, where are we going? And what are all those shinigami doing around here? Shouldn't they be in other worlds, handing out notebooks?", I asked and kicked up some dust. „We are going to meet Annar. He is second in command after Death. He is the one which hands out new notebooks, plus, gives a New One his powers", Sull replied. „The other shinigami you see,", he gestured around us,"way should they bother to get an extra notebook and then go to some other world only to give it to someone else, if they can stay here and do nothing", he finished off and gave me a sideways glance. But Ryuk had. Ren had. Sull answered with out me asking,"Of course there are some that prefer to do exactly that. But that, I don't understand. I like better to just hang around an do nothing...or gamble. That I had to get you and-oh, I almost forgot...". He stopped and I almost ran into him. Could I? Could I touch other shinigami if I was one? I'd better find out later.

„What is it?", I asked. My stomach was full of stones. Had there been some misunderstanding. Was he going to send me back?

„I forgot to tell you the rules. That's the reason Death called me to fetch you", he groaned and sighed. „Rules?", I asked and felt relieve flowed over me. I wasn't being sent back. „You see, a shinigami has limits to what he can use his notebook for and so on and so forth", Sull said, looking at the faraway mountains. „OK", was all I had to say to that. The faster he told me those rules, the faster I'd get back to the human world.

Sull cleared his throat."First of all, a shinigami can not use his or her notebook to kill another shinigami, since we are already dead. There have been tales about some shinigami dieing but I don't believe them. You can find any living things on any planet in any universe through those," he added and pointed at the nearest ball,"and kill them from here". „How?", I asked, suddenly _very _exited. „Every ball represents a planet with at least some lifeforms. The Earth ball is over there somewhere,"he pointed to our left. I thought they all looked the same. „You can use the Portal-Pits to go to every planet you want. But, you can not stay in that world for more than 82 hours without having given a Death Note to someone there. Since a god of death is not to own more than one Death Note, it is not forbidden but merely hard to get a second one, most of us stay here and some have never left the Shinigami Realm, ever", Sull said.

„Anything else?", I asked. „Mmm...no, not for the time being", Sull said and shrugged. Not true. I bet that Sull is just to lacy to tell me the rest. Doesn't matter. I know everything there is to know already. I am Kira. And I have used the Death Note to the fullest, uncovered all of it's secrets. The rule that states that a shinigami will die if he lengthens someones lifespan by killing another one, is generally not known to other shinigami. And some (Ryuk, Sull) know even less than they should after having used the Death Note so much. Or maybe they just used it without discovering all of it's secrets.

„Then shouldn't we get going? I bet this is a drag for you, having to see to me like this?", I asked in what I thought would seem like pity. „Uh, yeah", Sull said and started walking again. After a couple of minutes Sull and I stopped in front of a big, dark hole that went quite steeply down into the ground.

„OK then, this is as far as I go", Sull said and wings pread from his back. „I'm to go in there? Is this where Annar is?", I asked, ready to run down there. „Yup. Bye, Kira, see you later",and then he was off, flying through the smoky mist.

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.com


	2. Chapter 2

I do not own Death Note.

* * *

When Sull had disappeared I turned around, towards the big hole again. Hmm, Should I have asked for a flashlight? Or a torch? Whatever, I was wasting time.

My feet made *tokk, tokk, tokk* sounds that bounced of the walls when I ran further and further into the ground. The air was moist and I could just barely see the walls around me. After a few meters, I had to slow down and put my right hand on the wall because everything had gone totally black. „Hello?", I asked. _Hello, _went the echo of my voice, deeper and further away until it vanished. I started making my way forwards again. The wall was now dripping with cold water and my right hand sleeve was soaked from touching it. How long was this tunnel?

_He tricked you, Light. This is a trap. _My shoes slid in something gooey on the floor, probably mud...but I wasn't going to check, if I'd find out it wasn't. And then I just stood there, listening to the silence that was only ruptured with the occasional sound of drops falling from the hole's ceiling and onto the ground. I turned my head to look back the way I had come. I could see nothing.

„Hey, Annar! It's me, Kira. Where are you?", I shouted, getting a little spooked now. What had I been _thinking _running into the ground like this, without any second thoughts or suspicions? Fuck this. _Fuck_.

My head jerked up as I heard something. Something like metal being scraped over rock. It was faint, but I had heard it. I didn't dare move, I only realised I had been holding my breath when my lungs started screaming at me. I put a hand over my mouth, to make the sound of my breathing less detectable. There it was again, and if I wasn't mistaking, it had moved closer. My eyes were all over the place, trying to see what they couldn't. _Run! _No, I _cant_. It's possible that whatever it is that's coming closer and closer can't find me unless I make some sound.

*Scccrrrrrrr*! It was so close now I could feel the vibration in the ground and it sent cold shivers up and down my back. Then, hot breath, so bad I almost fell to my knees, filled my face. „Who...are you?", a horribly rasping voice cut my ears. A shinigami? Annar? Or something else...

„I am Kira", I managed, trying to get my thoughts organized. It was hard, with my head ringing and this terrible smell. „Are you Annar? I've come to get my notebook". A small pause. „I'm a New One".

The thing/shinigami took it's time finding an answer. I was beginning to think it hadn't heard me when he said,"I am Annar", he took a break between every word. OK, so this is Annar. Can I be sure? No. No, there isn't even a way to find out. Oh well, what the heck, I'm dead anyways, what can he possibly do? „Death told me... to be expecting... you", Annar said. A long pause again. This was a little frustrating. „...So...", I trailed off. What now?

„A shinigami... has taught you the rules... I assume?", Annar asked. „Yes, and I'm ready to get my Death Note now", I said, couldn't hold back the gi_ve-me_ tone as well as I would have wanted. The ear-splitting metallic scraping noise came again. „Very well", Annar sighed. „Repeat after me... „.

Should I put my hand over my not-beating heart or something? Nah. Then, Annar spoke,"Ég, guð dauðans, samþykki alla þá skilmála sem mér eru settir og lúti vilja þess hæst setta". I hadn't understood anything he just said, but OK. „Ég, guð dauðans, samþykki...", the change was so sudden I almost forgot the words I was suppose to say. I felt all lighter and it was like hot liquid started running through my veins. „Alla þá s-skilmála sem mér eru settir", my eyes...I was starting to see my surroundings, and the silhouette of something standing before me in the hole. „Og lúti vilja þess hæst setta".

God, Annar looked hideous. He was all hunched over so his back looked like a snail's shell. He had no eyes in his dead, dry face but the sockets were staring at me like they could see my soul. There was a long metal tail which swung around behind him and it looked very sharp, wouldn't want to get in a fight with this one. His hands looked more like many long, thin and sharp spider legs and he was wrapped in something scaly.

But before I could back away I felt a terrible pain in my back. It was so intense I doubled over and fell to the ground, white stars swimming before my eyes . There came a ripping noise. And then...it was over.

„_Aowwhh_!... What the _hell _was that?", I gasped and clawed at the wet ground with my fingers. Of course Annar didn't say anything. I pushed myself up to my knees, cursing at the mud on the front of my shirt, jacket and pants. I turned my head to see what had attacked me, and froze. Two, huge, leathery wings were spread out from my shoulder blades. „Ha", I breathed in astonishment. „Ha...ha, haha...". I don't believe this. „_Hahahaaahahahaa!_ This is _GREAT!_", I yelled at nothing in particular and jumped to my feet. I have wings! I can _FLY!_. „This is every humans dream. To be able to glide through the sky, touch the clouds...with those, I am truly a_ god_!", I cried out. I turned to Annar again. „And what? Now I'm a true shinigami, right?", I was overflowing with delight. I'd show Near. I'd show them _all!_

„Yes", Annar said. Then I saw his tail, whipping at me with such speed it blurred. _Crap. _I jumped to the side but knew I'd be too late. However, the metal edge of the tip, two sharp needle-like claws, stopped right in front of my face when I'd bumped into the wall and slid to the ground. And on the tip, was a black notebook. My eyes bulged.

At last.

I came running through the hole's mouth and into the grayish light again so fast I almost face planted when the tip of my shoe hit a rock. My hands were clutching the Death Note, _my personal Death Note, _ so hard it actually hurt. And my _wings. _I felt GREAT! I had never been as happy in my_ life_! Now all I had to do was steal another book from some stupid, snoozing shinigami and I'd be off. I slowed down, kept my head low. Didn't want to be dragged into some unwanted conversation.

My victim was a small creature. It had one huge closed eye and was green, with yellow dots on the short, fat fingers. I knew I'd only have one chance. If he'd wake up, I was screwed. Although shinigami don't need sleep, they like to do nothing. I walked fast towards him, looking in every direction for eyes that might be looking back. There were non. This was too easy. I could even see the notebook's corner coming out of the shinigami's torn pocket. I was almost there. My hand shot out, caught the corner, slid the book out...and I was off again. When I glanced back I saw that he hadn't even stirred. _Hahahaa! _Now I had all I needed to get back at everyone, and everything, I wanted.

I had to ask direction for the Earth ball-thingy a couple of times, both notebooks safely on the inside of my jacket, because the shinigami rarely pointed in the same direction. But finally I found it. The gaps in the round surface resembled the landscape on Earth. So, I can find anybody I want to in this thing as long as I know what I'm looking for. Let's see. The ball was a little higher than me but I could reach the top easily. When I looked inside it, I could see another smaller ball and inside that one was an empty space. I ran a hand through my hair. What now? I walked in a circle around the round object. I touched it, felt the cold surface. „Um...", I looked around, feeling like an utter idiot. „Show me Near", I commanded in a low voice.

Nothing happened.

OK, don't panic. Stay calm. Maybe I have to...no, I don't know what I have to do. Concentrate. Yes, _concentrate_. Think of his face...I closed my eyes. I though about his staring eyes and his light hair. I though of his name. His _real _name. Nate River. _I need to find Nate River_ I said in my mind.

I opened my eyes again.

And the gap in the smaller ball was now like a screen; a window into the human world, somewhere up in the sky. It was showing me a city far, far below. I wondered if I would start falling if I'd jump into the ball. Or if I could feel the fresh air if I put my hand in there. But then the image started flying down. Faster and faster. It was nighttime. I could see the never-ending stream of cars on the roads. This was...in Japan? I recognized the building stile and the flashing lights again. My stomach hardened. This was my home. _Had _been my home at least. My kingdom. Here I had started my parade as Kira. And here it had ended too. I would never be able to go back to my normal life. And I was glad. I knew I was. My mouth smiled. But my eyes didn't. Because even though I knew I wouldn't _want _to go back. I still wanted to...have the option you know...

I was so close to the top of the buildings now I was afraid the screen might crash into them. The cars below seemed to move slowly because I was moving so fast. In what part of Japan was this? I tried to recognize my surroundings. The gaping windows whipped past me.

And I knew where I was.

How foolish Near, how foolish.

The building I appeared to be about to smash into was the same building in which L and I had played our little game. It was the hotel he had had built, just for the Kira-case. And now, Near had moved in? He decided that the very place L was murdered in was the best place for him to stay in? Well, the hotel was well guarded...from anything human anyway. Did Near think that he would never encounter a shinigami again? Uh, when I thought about it, I could see his reasoning. It was like... one in a 6500 millions. My eyes narrowed as the image slowed down in front of a window on one of the top floors. And went straight through.

I was looking into a dark room. No lights on. Was he asleep somewhere around here? It didn't affect me that there was no light. I could see in the darkness on Earth just as easily as I could in the Shinigami Realm.

There was a couch and a TV. I could see a table and two chairs. Where is he?

The screen floated lazily towards a closed door. And right through. Now I was in a bedroom.

_There._

The king-sized bed was covered in pillows and blankets. But there was definitely someone laying there, huddled into a ball. I was so close now.

And there he is. _Near._I could see his real name and his lifespan floating in bright red and black above his head.

I recognized his light, wavy hair and his...wh-what? His face, half buried in one of the pillows, was much older than I remembered. His jawline had become more visible, his chest, slowly raising and falling was broader and he looked taller.

_How can this be? He looks like he's about the same age as _L _was when he was alive._

„How long has it been since I...since I died?", I muttered to myself. But of course, time does not pass at the same speed everywhere. It has been proved time and time again. Like when NASA sent two clocks into space at the same time, just not the same distance, from Earth. When they came back, the one that went further away, was a little behind the other one. So this shouldn't have been a shock to me. But it was.

Damn it. Then what about Misa? Was she... She had cut her lifespan in half _twice..._ She was 17 when she first cut it. Lets see, I glanced at a small calender which hung up on the wall. There had passed... _six years! _My head snapped back to Near. Wow... that's...weird...But where was I, oh yes, which means that if she could have lived to 80...she'd only make it to...32, if she was 28 now, she had 4 years left of her lifespan ; give or take a few months.

Should I check up on her?... No, I have no time to loose.

A grin crept onto my face. Near...Nate River...you have no idea just what I'm going to do when I get you.

I whirled around. Now that I knew where he was, I only had to jump into a portal and get going. Although...I'd better test out my wings first.

I glanced back and made them flutter a little. „Hehh...". This was so strange. I can't describe how it feels. I know that it's hard to...no..._impossible _to imagine how it is. Don't even try it. You can't. If I wasn't feeling it right now, I wouldn't believe it either. It's like, having a dead man's arm sewn onto your chest and expect it to be able to come alive; have it bend the way you want and feel what it feels. It's so amazing to look at those black and leathery wings and just _know _how to use them, like they have always been there.

I had them stretch out...and pushed them down with as much force as I could.

„_Oh my GOD!", _I cried as I shot up into the smoky air. I hadn't expected it to be this easy. I felt the dry air in my hair, on my wings. And then I was falling, quickly. I put my hands in front of my face in defence when the rough ground came towards me and made a pitiful attempt to flap my wings again. I managed, but didn't do much to help myself. In stead, I shot to my right and crashed into the dust, hard.

After a couple of tries, I thought I'd gotten the hang of it. I'd figured out how to make the wings fold back into nothing and then come forth when I wanted them too. And it didn't hurt like the first time. Although there were two big rips in the back of my dirty jacket and shirt. I'd have to get some new clothing before meeting with Near as a shinigami. Maybe I'd get a black leather jacket? I pictured myself all in goth...uh, maybe not. I'm just going to stick with my old look.

I only felt a little sore after all the crash-landings. Nobody asked if I needed any help. I hadn't expected them to either.

And then I stood there, looking at one of the bright-glowing portals. This is it. Be ready to face Kira again, N. You didn't think you'd actually win did you?

I jumped in, my wings unfolding in mid air. I glided forwards; everything had gone white. I thought about where I wanted to go, who I wanted to see. And then the cold night air ripped at my lungs, so clean compared to the dull air I had grown used to. I was right over Japan.

„_HAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA_!", I laughed. I felt the hot need to punish again, make evil pay again. „KIRA IS _BACK_!", I screamed at the stars. If I wasn't a shingami, I wouldn't have been surprised if someone could have heard me way down there.

And then I was off, flying towards the hotel, towards my revenge, to wards Nate River. Both Notebooks safely inside my jacket.

* * *

**AN.**

I thought you guys might want a little inside look at some of the names and stuff I use in my story

So, I'm from Iceland. And I thought it might be cool to spice things up with that.

-First of all, I knew some of you might want to know what Annar made Light say in the tunnel. He said (rough translation) :"I, god of death, agree to all terms I have been given and bow down to the highest ranked". Uhh, it sounds much better in Icelandic though :p

Second: names. They have meaning. They aren't just some random letter.

Annar=second (like second in command you know)

Sull=Goo or something messy

-in chapter one you will find:

Frost=just Frost but the _actual translation _is Cold.

Scrimsli=this is suppose to be like what kind of creature you are, like, I'm _human._ Scrimsli came from the word _skrímsli_. I just didn't want to use Icelandic letters. Skrímsli means a monster.

Oged= is like Scrimsli; it says what kind of creature you are. Plus, I took out the Icelandic letters. Oged is really _Ógeð. _And Ógeð means Disgusting.

Oh yeah, and how long Misa has left of here lifespan, I actually calculated it. If she was 17 first when she made the eye-deal and she could have lived till 80. 80-17 = 63. 63/2=31. 31/2=15. About 5 years passed in the books. 15-5=10. And now 6 years have passed. 10-6=4 years left. Oh, yes. And I guess that now, Near would be around 20. If he was 9 when we first saw him at the orphanage, 5 years passed. 9+5=14. And then 6 years now. 14+6=20.

**Review** for more chapters of „The second life of Light Yagami". And **Merry Christmas**!


	3. Chapter 3

Don't own Death Note or any characters in it :p

* * *

He was sleeping there, just like he had been when I had looked at him through the Earth-ball-thingy.

He was so peaceful. So helpless. _Easy pray _my mind suggested. Now that I was here...I didn't know what to do. This is it.

Oh, wait.

I turned on my heel and looked around. I'd have to find something clean to wear first. I spotted a closet with my night-vision and walked over to it. When I opened it up, careful not to make any sounds (even through humans can´t see shinigami when they haven't touched the notebook they can still hear closet doors sliding open) I saw a long row of white shirts.

No jackets though. This would have to do.

I found some pants too and then changed clothing. I took the notebooks from my old, dirty jacket and put them on the floor. Then I grabbed the old clothes and poked them in between some books on a shelf. There, that should be enough. I reached down for the Death Notes again.

Then I turned back to Near.

_..._

Should I just make the book fall on his face or...? Oh well, if I'd just put it on his bedside table he'd never touch it without gloves or some kind of equipment. And so, I held the other shinigamis' notebook in my hand over Near's head...and let go.

I swear the book fell in slowmotion. The pages rippled and Near sighed.

_-Donk-_

„Ah...?", Near the teenager mumbled drowsily as one of the corners hit his temple. His right hand, the one not wedged under his pillow, clawed lazily at the sore spot on his head. And the notebook fell to the floor with a thud.

„Wh-a-a?", Near croaked and rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He didn't notice me. Probably because he wasn't expecting anyone... and because I'd moved a few steps backwards, into the shadows.

The teen poked his nose over the edge of the mattress and peered his eyes on whatever it was that had attacked him in his sleep. He probably didn't recognise it at first because his hand reached slowly towards it to pick it up.

But then it froze, only a couple of centimeters above it.

If I hadn't seen so well in the dark I wouldn't have seen Near's body tense up under all those pillows and his white blanket. I probably wouldn't have seen his eyes bulge even more than usually either. Then his head jerked up, and he was out of bed in less than a second.

_Hehh_. This was fun. I should let the doubt wrap it's hands around him for a few more minutes. And therefore I made myself untouchable, something I hadn't discovered I could do until I had flown through the window earlier this night, and stepped into the wall as far as I could without loosing sight of Near.

He spun around. His eyes looking every were.

„H-hello? I heard him whisper. He looked down at the black object again. Then he reached up to his temple. In moments he had jumped to the light switch and turned the lights on.

I was careful not to show myself.

_Ring, Ring...Ring, Ring..._

Near eyed the phone on his table. Then he lunged for it.

„L", Near said when he put the phone to his ear. There was a small pause.

„...No...", he said, still looking around the room, his blond hair a mess after the night.

„No, it's fine, I just...I'll tell you in the morning...", Near answered someone and then waited.

„OK. Yeah, I'm sure. Fine. G-goodnight Matsuda", Near hung up.

_Matsuda! That son of a bitch! It was he who__'d_ shot _me in the hand. It was his fault actually that I couldn't kill Near in the first place. And so, in a way, it was his fault that I died._

I growled to myself but then quickly backed into the wall again when Near's head whipped toward the sound.

_Because if I had killed Near, Ryuk wouldn't have written my name down. Then again...if he hadn't...I wouldn't be able to go forth with my plan right now. Hmm, if you thought about it that way...this was actually better. I'd have more fun this way._

The corners of my mouth turned upwards. But then down again.

_But I _had _lost, Near had won. I guess I'd just have to, ohh I don't know, crucify Matsuda later or something._

But now the lights were off again. I peeked inside and saw that Near had sat down on the edge of his bed. The notebook still on the floor, untouched.

I stepped forwards, inched my way to the bed and saw Near's eyes were closed.

A wide grin played over my face.

_Let us begin._

I stood a few inches from him, my fingers twitched excitedly in the air, and I whispered,"Nate River, surprised?".

Near's eyes flew up, and he was standing by the window in record time, his back pressed to it. His face showed focus but no fear. He glanced over my silhouette briefly and then to the notebook.

„I never actually thought this day would come...", he said, more to himself than to me.

„Oh didn't you?", I asked and snorted a little. „If I were you, I'd talk a little lower, as to not alarm the ones that might be listening", I suggested and took a step closer. „But by the way, I thought I'd get a little stronger reactions from you..."

I took another step and now the dull light coming through the window lit up my face.

Near stood completely still. But then I saw the recognition darken his eyes. „Y-you...", his voice trembling. This was a shock for him, seeing me, Kira, again. I was suppose to be dead, wasn't I?

Now his whole body started trembling a little and his hands grabbed the windowsill until the knuckles turned white.

„H-how? Way? You're...you're dead. I s-saw the shinigami write your name into his book...", he managed and gritted his teeth. "I saw you _die_"_._

„Oh, you're surprised, even frightened, are you not? I can see it.", I said, I was so excited, so insanely happy with the reaction I was now getting, I could hardly contain myself.

Near had, apparently, lost his ability to speak. His mouth just opened and closed again, no words or sounds, just his hard breathing.

„Yes, Kira...is _back_", I continued and stepped closer. The teen shrunk a bit back which was so funny I wanted to cry out with joy."And I... am going to kill you", I finished.

Near swallowed loudly and stared at me, his face full with terror. But then it changed. And he was off, jumping over his bed and grabbing the Death Note.

„No, you're not", he whispered.

„Oh? Way?", I asked, this was amusing. What was he going to do? Write _my _name is the notebook? Like _that _would work.

„I don't know what you are," Near said but I cut him off.

„A shinigami".

„_W-what_? _How_?...no that's not relevant right now...", he tried again,"I d-don't know what you think you're about to do, but it wont work. I'm going to turn on the lights again and have this book destr-",he said but I cut him off again.

„No ,Near, that won't work", I said calmly and watched as he put a finger on the light switch.

„First off all", I said,"if you turn that light on I'll have to punish you by, oh I don't know, killing someone from your team...like...Matsuda? Wasn't he the one calling you back there? I have some unfinished business with him anyways". I practically heard Near's brain kicking itself fore some miracle solution which didn't exist. Then he slowly put his had to his side.

This was so funny and good! Near had probably never been this confused before in his life. Everything was logic with him, there was always some solution to every puzzle, to every mystery. But not tonight, not now. I drew in a breath (way?) and straightened up. There is no way to escape, new L. I'll win.

Near didn't seem to like the change in my features and a frown crossed his lips.

„What? Can't handle to loose, huh? Can't handle this unsolvable problem?", I snickered and moved closer. „Can't handle the consequences? Just like L and Mello and dad, couldn't?", I asked, anger now getting hold off me.

I came even closer, I was now only a few steps from Near. He just stood there, didn't say anything.

„You think you're so great?", I kept on going, my voice not calm anymore. I heard it but couldn't do anything about it. I was getting all hot inside.

„Kira...", Near breathed and I realised I was now standing right in front of him.

_Don't loose your temper Light. Stay cool. You can be angry later._

„What do you...want? Way did you give me...this?", he held up the Death Note,"Way haven't you just finished this already?", he asked.

„Way haven't I killed you yet you mean?", I asked and Near nodded.

I looked at him, he was as tall as I was now. It was frustrating.

Before I could answer, Near did it for me.

„I'm not enough.", he said, disgust on his face. „It's not enough just to kill me...you want the ultimate revenge. It wont be enough for you just to win. You want to rub it in my face. You want to show everyone that you can't just kill Kira and get away with it. You're going to make me suffer...But there is something more, isn't there, otherwise you would have just made the notebook touch me and then take it back. But you let me keep it.", he said, analysing all my actions.

„Well, kind off", I said and shrugged.

„But it's going to be way more fun", I added.

„But I could just write my own name in _this _notebook", Near said and raised an eyebrow.

I glanced at him, measured him. But it was unnecessary. I knew he wouldn't.

„No", I said firmly. „You won't. If you do, I win", I said and shrugged.

It was true. And Near knew it too. He would never write a name in that notebook willingly, let alone his own.

„But you are right", I said,"there is a reason I let you have that Death Note".

„Hm?", Near hummed and looked at it again.

„You are going to kill for me", I said and saw the immediate answer in Near's eyes. He would not do it. Or, so_ he_ thought.

„You will kill for me", I said again,"or I will kill what is most precious to you", I said.

Near tilted his head to the side."You can't make me write anything down in that notebook", he hissed and then lowered his voice again."If _I _kill _anyone_ you have already won because anyone in my team or anyone out on the street_ is_ what is most precious to me", he said.

I grinned,"you are forgetting", I whispered,licked my lips, „about...the orphanage".

The silence that filled the room was so thick and poisonous you could taste it.

Cold sweat materialised on Near's forehead."Y-you..._no_...", he stammered.

„Ha! You think I wouldn't? Now that I am a God of Death, I can see anyone's name and lifespan. And this is the only way. You care for that place, this was your home".

„You _couldn't_", he managed and the notebook fell to the floor.

Near raised his eyes to look at me and the pain in his expression was so intense I almost felt pity for him.

_Almost. Remember what he did to you. You were only trying to help, and he ruined _everything.

Near was so small before me now it made me laugh aloud. He winced.

„But...please..._Light_...", he began. „The Kira I know wouldn't hurt children".

„Well", I said, my voice harsh,"the Kira you knew, you killed. Plus, you didn't seem to like me cleaning this world then, spearing innocent lives but making those who deserved it pay". The anger boiled in me again. I desperately needed something to break.

I glanced at Near and my jaw clenched. My right hand made a tight fist.

_This is for everything, you fuck._

My fist hit Near's mouth with such force the shock went all the way up to my shoulder.

_Bang!_

Near's head flew back and hit the wall; hard. Then he slid down to the floor.

„Ughh...", Near gasped, his lower lip split, blood flowing down his chin.

I waited for the phone to ring, it didn't.

Then I felt some thing hit my leg just below my knee,it hurt, but not a lot. Shinigami can not die from injuries or wounds. Thus we don't feel much pain, but still.

Anyways, my leg gave and I fell down on my knees. Near had kicked me with his heel and was getting up. I thrust a blow in his face again, blood smeared on my hand. He fell backwards again.

_How _dares _he?_

I stood up and kicked his stomach. And again.

He gasped and curled himself into a tight ball, this would teach him.

Oh, and I'd better stay untouchable near Near from now. Otherwise it could cause... unneeded trouble.

As I stood there over Near, listening to him gasp for air, a thought crossed my mind. Way? What did I gain from this? What would I get from this revenge? Sure, Near and the others would be killed. But what then? Am I just going back to the Shinigami realm and...gamble? Sleep? Way not just go back and...research other worlds?

All those questions flowed over me at once. But I was already here, wasn't I? I couldn't just go back down now...no...no.

„O...OK...", Near cried so faintly I almost didn't catch it.

„Hm?", I hummed, still deep in my thoughts.

Near slowly uncurled and sat up, his face streaked with tears. This gave me no pleasure.

„I...", he sniffled and buried his face in his hands, blood had dripped onto his white pajamas. „I'll do what you want...if you promise not to harm or even... _touch _the children."

I paused. „Fine".

Near kept on crying, not so grownup anymore as I'd felt he was just moments before. I remembered him differently. More confident, more...everything. Maybe being this powerful, _unbeatable_... had changed everything much more drastically than I'd expected. I took a step closer and reached my hand down to his collar to heave him up on his feet. Then hesitated, drew it back, stuck it into my pocket.

„Umn", I began, thinking about what I had planed to say. „So, this is what you'll do, listen good because I'm only going to say this once, L".

Near didn't look up or anything but I could feel him listening.

„You will go downstairs tomorrow with the Death Note...and you will reveal it to the others", I said. „You will tell them a shinigami came to you a week ago and gave it to you...you then tell them you have been thinking long and hard about what to do, how to face this matter". I paused. „And you will tell them you have come to the conclusion that you want to use it to help you and the others out, to get rid of the most dangerous criminals I mean, that it would be the best way."

Now Near looked slightly up.

„The others will _flip out _and ask you why the _hell _they are just hearing about this now and _way _you have decided to _use _it when the original goal was to get rid of it. They will no doubt want to touch it too. And now I'm leaving it up to you to...improvise. Tell them whatever, lie, say that ever since I was killed, the world has been going down hill or just...you know..._spin_. You're good at that".

„But I thought you wanted me to kill them all?", Near asked slowly.

„_Pfff_", I snorted,"that would be way too easy. And now...comes the juicy part".

Near was staring at me, no longer crying, the blood beginning to dry.

„You will make it so that the others", I grinned,"start doubting your intentions. You will make them suspicious of you using it not only to kill bad people but also people that have been standing in your way or talking shit about you. And when someone, _anyone _of the team, makes an argument about this, which they _will,_ you will kill him. You will make it look like an accident. Then of course everybody else will know it was you. And when they are convinced... you'll take them out one at a time. Slowly, steadily. Until only Matsuda is left. He's _mine_...". I stopped, realising I was starting to tremble.

„So...this is your master plan? To turn everyone against me...", Near asked, grimacing.

„Yes. And this will no doubt go public too. You are so smart and clever this plan _can not go wrong._ And if it does...", I trailed off and shrugged. He'd know what happened then.

„What will you do to Matsuda?", Near asked, surprisingly calm.

„Reveal myself to him. I'll probably force him to kill his family...or you", I said and looked out the window.

„And what then?", Near asked, shifted a little and flinched at the pain in his ribs.

„What when?".

„When everyone is dead? What will you do then?", he asked again and tried to stand up.

I didn't answer. I didn't know...

„You don't know right", Near said as he'd heard my thoughts. „You'll get what you want and then...just float around, not able to die, not able to become Kira again. No-one will know you've come back".

„I'll figure something out. I'll hand the notebook to someone worthy of th-„

„Yeah, but it won't be you", he said, now leaning against the wall.

I just looked at him. He was right. But so what?

Near stared back.

We both knew he was right. And we both knew I wasn't going to just walk away now.

This was it.

This was the beginning of the end.

* * *

Tada! So, what do you think? Oh, and I'm sorry it took so long for me to write this, exams you know :Þ But now their over!

And I just wanted to _thank_ those of you that have faved, alerted and reviewed so far :) It means a lot to me, it really does.


	4. Chapter 4

Don't own Death Note :0)

I just wanted to thank all off you guys again that have faved, alerted or reviewed. It encourages me to write faster and better stories. Cheers!

* * *

The sun is shining, cars are being driven by busy people down on the streets.

Everything is so normal.

I'm laying on the roof of what I now call ´the hostel'. Of course it isn't...but I ain't going to call it ´the hotel´.

The rough stone under my palms and fine dust settling in my hair isn't a bother, it's quite nice. It feels like...I haven't been in touch with anything this solid even after I came here first after the shinigami realm. I almost feel...normal? Then way does this hurt...inside? I can sense it much clearer when I'm not with the others. When I'm alone. Then I can think. Then I can wonder.

_What if?_

It's been three days now since I gave Near the notebook. And everything is flying around in my head. I close my eyes, see the red light filter through the lids.

This is all so complicated...but yet so easy. Too easy. There are no obstacles. I almost miss it. No. Not almost. I _do _miss it. But only because I know I'd manage anyways.

Near is doing a good job though. Well, an _excellent _job actually. But now everything goes by so slowly.

Aizawa...Mogi...Ide...Matsuda...Ukita...they are all still here. I thought at least Aizawa would go back to the police, but he didn't.

I'd learned a few things about the group since I saw them again. They are continuing on with what L started in the first place. Except now they are six, if you count Near too. So it's a lot easier job. Not as much stress. They work behind the scenes, busting sly and dangerous criminals. Yes, criminals have surfaced again. Quite many if you consider how well I'd ridden Japan off them earlier.

_Hehh._

And everything is going according to plan. Of course Aizawa is not happy with another notebook popping up in HQ. Mogi, Ide and Ukita aren't either...and Matsuda is basically terrified. Near is and has been taking out some of the bigger criminals now, alone, not letting anyone touch the Death Note. Just as planned.

I would sometimes guide him but he was fully capable himself.

I grinned.

Except for the first day, oh my. That had been quite the show.

* * *

„Hey, guys...", Near said and swallowed.

I stood beside him and took in eveyone's face, one by one. It only felt like yesterday to me when they'd found out my true identity. But it wasn't. It had been years. I smiled dryly.

„_Gooood_ mornin' ,Near", Matsuda greeted him with a grin.

„Hi",both Ide and Ukita said and Aizawa nodded, looking at his computer screen. Mogi wasn't there.

Near paused, shifting his weight from one foot to the other.

„Well", I said,"go on". If I had a beating heart it _would_ have been raising.

He glanced at me for a second.

"_Uhuhh_", Near cleared his throat to get attention.

Everyone turned their gaze to him.

It was funny to see how old they'd gotten.

„I have to tell you something...", he began but then faltered.

„Yeah?", Ide asked.

„Something wrong?", Matsuda asked worryingly. He'd always had an ability to sense these things.

„L", I growled, reminding him that this was not to go wrong.

„You see", Near said slowly.

Aizawa and Ukita exchanged looks.

Near sighed.

And then he began telling them my made up story about having gotten _this_, he whipped out the Death Note and gasps and other startled noises filled the room, a week ago. And that he'd decided to keep it.

Well, you know how that goes, blah blah, and when he finished questions with pre-made answers were booming at him.

Way? How? Who? Where?

Of course the men did not agree to Near's decision about using the Death Note. But Near was quite good at turning their minds around his fingers. And, like, 15-20 minutes later, everyone except Aizawa had agreed to use it maybe a little bit... it at least for now. Even Matsuda just frowned a little but then settled down.

When Mogi came back to the hostel, he got to hear about the new Death Note from the others. But he only hmm-ed and kept his thoughts to himself. But I could see he didn't like it at all, just like the rest of Near's team.

And then, that evening, Near's work began for real.

* * *

A bird flew over my head, it's shadow black against the light roof's surface.

I held every card in my hands.

Ah, time, moving so slowly. I wish I could fast-forward a couple of days. I _could _go into the shinigami-realm and make time pass a lot faster...but then I wouldn't be here, on the battle field. Nah, I'd just have to wait.

After a couple of precious moments I sat up and stretched.

When would the other shinigami, the one I stole from, come looking for it? That could be a problem. But it had taken Siddoh a looong time to come looking for his after Ryuk stole it.

„K-Kira...", Near whispered, his voice trembling as much as his hands. „Ah...uhn...I... c-can't".

He was sitting hunched on the floor, a pen in his hand, the notebook open in front of him.

I stood over him, feeling impatient and a little bored.

„Do it", I hissed.

„I _can't_", he repeated, throwing the pen down.

I crouched and grabbed his chin in my hand, forced him to look at me. My hand groped for the pen and thrust it into his cold palm again.

„Nate River, you will do as I say and you will do it_ now_. Write down his name, L", I growled and Near's eyes avoided my gaze.

I let him go and stood up again.

The small TV screen showed a man's face. He was quite handsome, around his thirties, light brown hair and deep-blue eyes. And he was a murderer.

_Looks aren't everything. I should know._

Near put the tip of the pen on one of the blank pages. And started drawing shaky lines.

R...O...

I grinned. Finally. Near's first kill.

B...E...R...T...

Near's hands were shaking so badly he had to press down hard to make his handwriting readable.

A...N...D...E...

He arched his head to look up at me, so in pain. His eyes were black and his lowers lip was trembling and his breathing was short and jerky.

„Finish", I said and make my voice as dark and smooth as I could

And he did.

ROBERT ANDERSON

...5 seconds. Near's fingers ripped his hair.

...20...25...30...35...

Robert Anderson was now having a heart attack.

He had been all over the news for murdering a 5 year old girl and her mother brutally. Still, it had been this hard for Near to kill him. Even though it was right. He deserved it. That man had done something terrible.

„This...should not...b-be", Near managed, tremors running through his whole body.

„But he was evil, this is just karma, L", I said and shrugged.

„_But I killed another human being!_", he shouted and punched the floor; hard. And again. And again.

„He had it coming", I said coldly.

„AAAAGHH! Uhh-hh", Near whined, almost blind with tears.

„You'll get used to it. You won't even notice when it happens. One day you'll just pick up that notebook and you will not hesitate. But when you _do _start getting the hang of it...I'll be sure to let you know", I whispered. And then I left him there, all alone, crying and yelling, on the floor.

* * *

And he had gotten the hang of it. Near uses the notebook openly in front of the others. I told him to do it.

This is quite interesting. I'd walk around the office and see looks of worry or pain on every face.

And what's more, nobody likes the idea of Near being the only one allowed to see the mysterious shinigami and hold the notebook. But since Near is in charge, he gets his way. For now at least.

This is already starting to shake the foundations of all trust there has been after they...got me.

Oh, yeah, also, it is quite funny to be able to see every ones life-span. Poor Ide, only has about 1 and a half year left. Wonder what will happen? An accident? Cancer? Oh well. Doesn't matte. He'll be dead in a couple of weeks...or days, and so will the others.

I walked through the door leading down from the roof and through the whole building. I saw a rather dull-lit hallway. There were steep, small steps.

I _could _have gone right through the floor and floated back to Near. But this was better. I still hadn't gotten used to the idea of not just falling down when I saw the ground a few feet below me.

As I made my way down and onto the top floor in this cursed building my mind drifted to something I hadn't thought about for all my time here.

Misa.

Wonder what she's doing now. Hehh, not like I care, but I'd like to know.

Maybe...I should pay her a visit?

But that would be stupid. She wouldn't be able to see me.

Unless...

...I'd let her.

And as I walked down some more steps, through a few more doors, it started making more and more sense. I mean, she would do anything I't tell here to. And if I needed anyone to write in the notebook after Near's dead, she'd do it.

And then, when she'd served her purpose, I'd kill her too.

Let's say it'd come to that. Then Near and Misa would have started killing a bunch of people as Kira. That would be noticed. Then, of course, Kira-worshipers would surfacing again. Then I'd be able to pick from them my next...user.

I smiled to myself.

_Yeah, this is all looking good._

But back to Near.

He had killed 43 criminals now. This was enough of that. I'd have to push him harder, get the plan going again. And I had just the right woman in mind. She worked for the police. She was powerful. And she had been someone who always doubted L...well, Near now. It had not been hard to find her on the Internet. Her name was Johanna Larsen.

And she was next on my to-kill list.

* * *

Now I'd reached the HQ floor, somewhere in the middle of the building, escape-routs everywhere.

When I walked into the office room, where all the computers and members of the team gathered to work I could feel the tension in the air. Near was sitting in one of the corners, computer by his side. He was probably looking for names to write down.

The others, all of theme, were sitting at the coffee-table chatting about something in low voices.

I glanced at Near and he seamed to see me in his peripheral-vision because he returned my gaze. Then looked down again, his brows pulled together.

I sighed and then watched Mogi scratch his head with a pencil.

What _are _they talking about?

I walked over and then leaned against the wall, near Ide and Matsuda.

„-what we should do...", Aizawa whispered and took a sip from his cup.

„Well", Matsuda said hesitating,"there aren't many options...I mean-",but Aizawa cut in again.

„We _know _that but, for real, any suggestions? I think...we should take it", he said and clearly hoped for some support from his buddies.

„What? Aizawa, we can't just walk up to him and _take _it. He'll get really angry and...besides, are you volunteering or?", Ide whispered and his eyes moved to Near, still sitting in the same position.

Aizawa didn't answer but just took another sip.

„That's what I thought...", Ide said and Aizawa glared at him.

Ukita sighed. „We shouldn't quarrel. But like Matsuda said: if anyone has got a good idea, please share it".

None of them said anything.

_So, they have already started planning something...I should warn Near to never let the notebook out of his sight from now on. And if Johanna gets a heart attack it will go in the news. She is too famous _not _to go in the news if she dies. _Then, _that _must _push someone to confront Near. __That someone_ _will then die from an accident. This is bulletproof._

I pushed myself from the wall and walked back to Near.

„Hey", I said.

Near didn't answer, that would look odd wouldn't it?

„OK, I've got someone I want you to kill for me", I said and looked out the window.

Near did not give anything away.

Then he took the notebook, stood slowly up and walked to the door. I followed.

„Uh, Near, where are you going?", someone asked. I turned around. It was Mogi.

Near paused and then said with out looking back, to get some fresh air.

Then he opened the door, went out into the hallway and closed it again.

I followed.

* * *

„You know", I said, „you _could _have made up a better lie".

Near turned to me, and in the fluorlights out in the hall I saw how pale and bad he looked. There were dark shadows under his eyes and he was all so...thin, I can't describe it better.

„...Kira", he croaked.

„Sure, you go first", I said and crossed my arms.

Near staggered a little and then whispered something I couldn't hear.

„Sorry, I didn't quite catch that".

„I'm thinking about giving up my ownership of the notebook...", Near said to the floor.

_Huh?_

„Uuu, L, you seem to be forgetting about a little problem", I said and took a step closer.

Near didn't do anything.

„You know, the orphanage?", I suggested.

_Way was he saying this now?_

„I...know", he whispered. „But I just...can't".

_This was bad. Shit._

„Hehh", I laughed harshly. „No Near, and besides, think of all the lifes you would take by doing that, huh?", I said.

„This is all coming now, it's almost over", I tried again.

„...Yeah...", Near breathed.

„So", I said hurriedly, better to get this over with while Near was receiving information. It didn't look like he would be able to cope anymore. „The woman I need you to ki-...you know, her name is Johanna Larsen, OK?", I asked.

„...".

„You got that?", I asked.

„...She's that woman", Near said.

„Oh, so you know here? Well, that's good then". _Or not._

„...Yeah...fine".

Near looked at me and seemed to have aged a couple of years in those few moments we'd talked.

„...Just...get it done", I said and then turned my back to him.

_Damn it. I thought Near would be stronger than this...should I write down any of the team's name down myself just to get the plan started? What if Near _would _write his own name? What then?_

Damn it.

* * *

**AN: **You know what? I had NO idea what I was going to write about when I started this chapter. It took me about...two and a half days or something? Longer than usual. Ah, I always listen to music when I write or study math. Guess what? I'm listening to Disney music XD! Mulan, Tarzan, Hercules, Anastasia, The little Mermaid and more :)

If you'd like to listen to those songs in Icelandic try looking for the user´tunfiskurinn´ on YouTube


	5. Chapter 5

Don't own Death Note!

* * *

It's dark. Cold. My hands are trembling so badly it would be funny if not for the reason. Ahem, reason; I'm about to murder somebody. _Murder._ As in, that person stops breathing. For ever. Her family will cry at her funeral. Her friends too. I bet she has children. Probably more than one, probably more than two. And a husband. What I'm doing will affect many lives. And it will be in the news. And on my conscious...for ever and ever. But I've killed before. My first murder was a couple of days ago. He was a murderer too. But does that justify killing _him_? No. I'm not God. Killing a killer makes you an even bigger killer, a murderer. The pen is heavy, dark, cold. The Death Note is lying on the floor. It's pages mocking me with all the names written in there. Does it matter that I don't look them in the eyes when I murder them? Does it make it more humane, not as horrible? No. It doesn't. Some may say that it isn't really murder if you don't do it yourself, are on the spot. Bullshit. A sniper is as much of a murderer as a man with a pistol.

„Hahh...hahh...hahh", my breathing harsh, short gasps. Her name is Johanna Larsen. And she will be dead in a few minutes. And I'll have killed her, sitting in my room, in the dark, all alone.  
„Hahh...hahh". I despise myself. I'm doing this for myself. It's because I'm selfish, can't bear the thought of loosing all the children living in my old home. Selfish bastard. Rage strikes my core, my sole. My hand rips the black book to my feet, the pen hits the page hard. I write down the letters, messy but readable. NATE. I put the pen down again. Draw a line. Hard. And another. My name. I'm going to kill myself. Then I don't have to feel the pain, the fear, the AGONY of REGRET. Tears in my eyes. Falling onto the page. My shoulders shaking. And I cry like a child. I would not be surprised if someone could hear my soul rip in half. Because I CAN'T take my own life. I'm so afraid. I thought I was strong. I always knew what to do, the right answers, the mind games were fascinating. I loved them. But now, all I can think about is the raw blood on my crooked hands. It's eating me alive. I'm rotting inside. And it hurts so much.

My sobbing only grows louder and more hysterical. I'm so selfish. NATE RIV...  
My hand start scribbling on the page again. A whine, like a dying animal, except it's my own mouth making it. I hold my face and dig my nails into the skin. It's a little better to feel physical...but it's just not deep enough to dull the mental one. JOHANNA LARSEN. I'm a monster. I'm...becoming something much darker than I'd like to think. If I only had the guts to finish my own name. But I don't. I can't take my life...like this. I guess I could throw myself out the window. But I know I won't.

Then a new thought hits me, slowly. Now that I've killed this woman...God. Oh God. Someone from the team will no doubt soon be dead. But not by my hands. I'll reject Kira. See whether he really does something about it. My head hurts.

I need release. An idea hits...

I grab the notebook, stagger to my feet. Wipe my eyes on the back of my hand. And head for the small kitchen. I've heard that people that have a really hard time...hurt themselves to easy the pain. How ridiculous. Or so I though. Well, it shouldn't hurt to try? I grab a big knife from the knife stand. Then change my mind and go for a smaller one. How should I begin?"Where's a manual when you need one?", I murmur to myself and grin. Pull my sleeve up, turn my hand down and put the tip if the blade on my forearm. And press hard. The tip slices through my skin. „Oww", I moan from the sting and winch a bit. Blood starts pooling from the cut, I haven't pulled the knife back out. Oh, an even though the cut isn't that deep, there's more blood than I expected. But this isn't helping much. I stare at the crimson red a bit disappointed. A more serious wound maybe? I bite my lower lip and slowly but steadily drag the knife up my arm, about two inches. „A-ahh...owww, ow, ow", I pant. This isn't helping. „RAAARG!", I snarl, anger welling up again. I pull the knife tip out of my flesh and throw it across the room. „FUCK!", I scream and clasp my right hand over the wound. But blood is still oozing. Tears come to my eyes again. Blood drops have found their way into my pants and shirt.

„What the _hell _are you doing?", I hear someone say behind me accusingly. My heart skips a beat, I'm so taken of guard. I whirl around ad there stands...Light Yagami of all peop-...agh, _things_. I'm _soo not _in the mood to even look at his _face _or hear his _voice_. It makes me sick. Before I can tell him to fuck off he's crossed the distance and grabbed my wounded hand in his.

„I asked you what the hell you're doing! What are you, mentally disturbed or?", he yells at me and starts dragging me towards the bathroom.

„Let me _GO!_", I cry and rip my hand out of his grasp.

Kira turns around, blood on his hand and gives ma a mean look.

„You just _cut _yourself. And I'm not gonna let you bleed to death you know. Now come on," he says and starts towards the bathroom again,"we have to bandage and cl-„ he says but I cut him off.

„No.".

He pauses again. „Way?".

I just stand there, a little surprised by my actions. But now I'm not scared anymore. I know a way out of this, so I don't have to suffer alone. I turn on my heel and start running for the door.

Of course Kira follows, as expected, yelling something like _stop _and _Near!_ When he realised this does not work he just follows silently.

When Kira realises I'm heading for HQ he grabs my shoulder but I shrug him off.

„You're all covered in blood, L", he says calmly. „How do you think the others will react to that?".

I don't care. If Kira knew what I was about to do, he'd probably tackle me to the ground. Great he can't read minds.

I open the office door and burst in. Everyone's there, talking, even though it's the middle of the night. Way? Has Johanna gotten in the news so quickly? It can't be. But, what ever.

Everyone's head whips back to look at me and to ask what all the rackets about but then it's like somebody hit the _mute _button. Nobody moves, nobody says anything. They just star at me as I run to them. Then the bubble bursts.

„What happened to you!", somebody shouts.

„Way are you bleeding!", someone else cries.

„Aizawa", I wheeze.

„Who did this to you?", he gasps.

„Wait", I say. And everybody waits for me to carry on. Even Light, which still doesn't understand anything. I turn face him. And I swear, everything went slowmotion like in the movies.

I pull the Death Note from under my shirt.

Kira's still just observing the scene.

I grab Aizawa's hand.

Kira's eyes bulge. „No", I only see his lips move, no sound.

And then I thrust the book into Aizawas palm.

Time resumes it's normal speed. Aizawa, Matsuda, Moge, the others, Kira, all sunned by my actions.

And then Aizawa and Light lock gazes. It's a pretty long moment.

Aizawa's eyebrows furrow and then fear explodes on his features. It must be pretty shocking, I remember how it was for me. Well, this doesn't make a lot of difference, that someone else knows what I know...but this must have done something to Kira's plans. Haltered them a bit?

A scream. Loud, horrible.

Aizawa is screaming at Light.

„Noo! _YOU! DEVIL!_", he cries and throws the notebook at Kira.

Light is stunned, doesn't know what to do. „Now you've done it...", he whispers, probably to me.

„Mogi, Ukita, grab Aizawa, prevent him from collapsing", I just stand there. Wondering whether I should get the book again and touch others with it.

„You can't see him but he's _there!_", Aizawa screams at his co-workers. He points at Kira and his fingers grab for something else to throw at him.

„It's him!", Aizawa calls again. „It's-", but he can't say anything else because Kira has jumped to him and grabbed his throat, clenching hard.

Gurgling noises escape him. Mogi and Ukita yell for help and the others come running. Ide is going to try and clear Aizawa's throat but Kira growls and punches him in the face so he falls back. To everybody else, who can't see what's happening, it's probably looks terrifying. And it is.

Matsuda tries the same thing as Ide but is also punched back. Aizawa has stopped trashing about. He's going to die.

In a instance I'm on Kira's back. To hold Aizawa's throat and to punch people you must be materialised. And he drops the dying mans neck, yelling with surprise.

A gasp behind us.

Kira turns, I fall through him and onto the floor. And we face Ide.

He had in the confusion crawled to my notebook, which had been thrown to the middle of the floor, and touched it.

Stunned he watched Kira.

„It's Light...", Ide says and everything goes still.

Kira looks at me, Aizawa scrambling back, afraid Kira might look at him too, and says,"Say it isn't so or everyone at the orphanage is dead".

I start to say his words but Aizawa then decides to break his silence and whispers. „It's him, it's _Kira_".

Kira converts his gaze to Aizawa and sighs,"Now you've really done it...".

* * *

A short chapter. I know. But this is suppose to be like, an intro, into the next chapter, so don't be mad :)


	6. Chapter 6

I do not own Death Note and never will...but I wish I did :D

...

„Now you've really done it...", I sigh and glare at Aizawa. This was _SO _not going according to plan.

„Mogi! Catch!", I hear Ide yell behind me, turn around and see the notebook fly through the air in a neat bow and land by Mogi's feet. I reach for it but only a little too late. Mogi sees me too, but I rip the book from his hands and hold it tightly against my chest.

„Near", I snarl and grit my teeth. Mogi collapses from shock.

Near doesn't reply. I glance at him, my eyes red with anger.

„I've decided I'm going to smother you with my own two _hands!_", I yell and run for him, but then hesitate. Near doesn't seam to care what happens to him anymore.

„Hahh!,", I turn again, see Aizawa, a grin on my face,"goodbye".

I whip out my own Death Note.

„No!", Ide and Mogi cry out at the same time, Aizawa too stunned to do anything.

My hand scribbles a name. Aizawa stares at me, a cry forms on his lips.

„How! You- I-... n-n-no", he babbles.

„What is it!", Ukita yells out suddenly, hasn't moved since Near came storming in a moment ago.

„I don't believe it's really Kira", Matsuda whispers, not believing what Aizawa said fully. Tears in his eyes, lower lip quivering.

_BA-BUMP!_

Aizawa gasps. Everyone stare at him. Aizawa puts a hand to his chest and then...his eyes go blank. He falls back. He's dead.

_Thud_...Matsuda has fainted. Uh, I guess he never was really strong.

„Well, Near", I finally say, converting my gaze to him again. He's pale, blood still running from his cut.

„I'll be going now", I grin. Near's eyes bulge. I drop his notebook on the floor, ain't taking it with me, they need it here.

„You demon!", Mogi yells. „I'm going to _kill _you!".

But I'm already gone. Drifting through space and time. It's a good thing I did my research while there was spare time. I know exactly where the orphanage is. Well, in half an hour, it won't be anymore. I chuckle to myself. No more future L's.

The world whips past me, wind has no affect, no-one notices me as expected. Then there is rain. Wow, it's just like someone turned it one to match the mood. And then I feel the ground under my feet. Standing on the pavement, looking up at the big mansion. The younger children are playing out side. Running and laughing. The older ones are probably inside, solving sudoku, playing chess or what ever the hell it is nerds do.

„Oh, yeah, just to keep it clear, _I _am not a nerd", passes through my mind and I smile to myself. Nah, at least I wouldn't think so.

But then I hesitate. Is this the right thing?

I look up at the setting sun and sigh, (This mansion is a long way from HQ and there for the sun is setting here) let the rain touch me, damp my hair, darken my clothes. I'm still holding my Death Note. Water has no effect on it, of course not.

Laughter. Cries of happiness. But only from most of the kids. Some are just sitting there, staring at nothing. I start to walk towards the great, old iron gate that prevents strangers from abducting anyone from the orphanage...or the children from escaping for that matter. I walk right through, then materialise again. A child, a young girl named Marta, runs fast me. She has about 76.8 years left to live.

I keep on going. Towards the double front-doors.

Inside there is not much noise. Except for some boys quarreling over what seams to be a candy-bar.

Something quite unpleasant is nagging at me. I ignore it, keep on looking around.

A teen, maybe 15-16 years old, is puzzling. Another one is drawing and then there is a boy with raven-black hair sleeping in one of the corners. His name is Jakob.

Into the kitchen.

No-ones there.

_Clatter-clatter._

I turn around. Oh, so there _is _someone here?

Another girl, about 7. She has long, white hair and red eyes. An albino. She's standing on top of a small stool, sticking her hand into a cookie-jar on the counter. She can't quite reach it. I stand there and watch her, half wondering what she would do if she could see me. Finally her hand comes out of the jar, holding a cookie. She smiles, gets down again and then runs out the door.

I follow her, wondering what she would have become when she grew up. Would she be pretty? Would she have children. Probably.

When I stand in the huge living room again I can't find her.

Then I see stairs leading up to the second floor. I guess I could look up stairs.

There is a huge window facing the stairs when you've reached the top. It faces towards the front lawn. The rain makes the children blurry. But there, the girl is running. She stops by a boys side and pokes him to get his attention. He looks up and she hands him something. The...cookie. He seems to laugh with joy, break it in half, give her back a piece.

I turn again, standing in the same spot, wondering whether I'm doing right.

Hesitation...

What to do? I walk slowly down the stairs again, breathing slowly, steadily. The children have not done anything...yet. Of course they could be brats, thinking about nothing else than what _they _want the world to be like. Three faces pop up in my head. Near...L...and Mello. My hands clench into fists. But maybe they were just different. I could try and pick out a few to live. Just...because it feels kinda wrong to kill them all just to get what I want. But then again, I never got what I wanted.

I walk slowly through the front door again, suddenly sick to my stomach, don't want to feel the rain, don't want to think, don't want to know of this world. I reach the gate and stop, turn around and look around. They are so innocent. I could leave, tell Near I've killed everyone, no-one would know for sure for a few _weeks _at least because this place is so secretive. So, Near would have to believe me. Right?

_I never did get what I wanted._

Laughter, splashing, running around. I turn off my mind. And start writing the first name down.

The world is a blurry mess of colours. Ink flows over the dry pages, fast, steady, black. The first youngster stops breathing. Then the second one and third. It takes a few moments for the screaming and horror to start. I walk amongst them, not touched or known off. No thoughts in my head. My eyes blank. No emotion. Blood as children's heads crash to the ground, hard. Adults have now come running outside to see what is the matter. _Fools_. Scribble. And they fall too. My hand, moving, writing. A white-haired girl runs past. Do I know here? My hand falters. Her red eyes display terror and agony, tears blending in with rain.  
And then her name is in my Death Note.

A few minutes have passed, I'm standing inside the quiet, cold house.

It's done.

I don't know how long I've been standing there when suddenly I regain my senses.

Still raining...

Everything, my sight, feelings, hearing...dull.

Bodies litter the floor. Staring, glassy eyes gaze at me blankly. Scattered puzzle pieces, a window even broke in the wrecked; water on the floor.

I can't know what to do next...thoughts not quite as clear as I'd like them to be.

I'm still holding the Death Note. Wonder what has happened at HQ. I put my pen on one of the pages, now full of names, and write three last names down.

_Ide._

_Mogi._

_Ukita._

...10 seconds...20...30...now only Matsuda and Near should be left standing.

I ready myself to go back...but then I change my mind.

I'm sick of all the secrecy, how long this is taking, how everything isn't going according to plan. I need help. Someone who can make it clear that Kira is back again.

_It's time to pay Misa a visit._


End file.
